Tuesday, August 17, 2010

The Expendables

This has been billed as the must see "guy movie" of the year. It has almost every legendary action star in the world in this one film. All except VanDamme who I could only guess that him and Stallone didn't get along in the past. This movie was slow moving in the beginning. The way people were hyping it I thought as soon as you sat down the screen was going to explode. When the opening credits rolled the names would blow up....NO! There were only about 3 action scenes before the main action sequence at the end of the movie. Why they had Dolph Lundren play a psycho drug addicted mercenary...who knows. Why was Mickey Rourke crying for 15 minutes about some chick in Vietnam that jumped off a bridge?? Why was Arnold Schwarzenegger wearing that ugly ass shirt...beats me.

This had all the 80's cliche moments compiled into one movie. And nobody died!! I was grateful that Terry Cruz didn't get blown up in some tragic thumbs up helicopter ride turned wrong scene. But the thing that got me was....where was the nudity??? At least Scott Pilgram had the girl in her panties for a scene. Sly went alllllllllllll the way to some godforsaken 3rd world country for this chick that he didn't even kiss?! Word Sly?? That's how you roll?

3 Stars

Does Stallone Speak English...oh I get it, it's a Foreign Film


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